Shit Philosophy + Shit Graffiti = SHIT CUNT.

I've been temping in an office in town for the last couple of days, which means I now have a walk to work. My walk takes me down a back street of Brighton City Centre that is covered in graffiti, some good and some shit but all, none the less, of a really high quality. Kudos vandals. But as I was walking, appreciating the hours of work that must have gone into the ten metre tall portrait of Marvin Gaye, my eye was drawn to a previously blank wall which has now been daubed with the sentence 'OUR GREAT WAR IS A SPIRITUAL WAR, OUR GREAT DEPRESSION IS OUR LIVES...' Eurgh.... What the fuck is the point.

Judging by the hand writing, the perpetrator could have been no older than 18. No doubt he had recently come out out of his first philosophy lecture with his mind suitably 'blown' and with the general feeling that they have seen 'the light' So what did this person do? Well, they wanted to spread the message. They wanted someone, anyone, to know that while we all stumble blindly along to our horrific office jobs, working for 'the man', THEY were not going to take it anymore. They knew better. There was another way. There IS another way. And what better way to show that to people than to scrawl some graffiti on a wall they walk past every day? But what to choose? Kierkegaard? Nietzsche? Kafka? Wait... FIGHT CLUB!!! YEAH!! FUCK THE MAN!! FUCK THE SYSTEM!!!

Eurgh... Why do people do things like this??? It does NOTHING, it is as fucking pointless as seeing how far you can push your finger into your nose. It achieves nothing, except making you look like a fucking doyle. I realise this is quite an obscure thing to hate, but I keep coming across it. Last time we were on tour we decided to take a detour through Luxembourg as we only had a short drive and none of us has ever been there before. I loved it, it was really historic and scenic, we walked around the old part and then up the hills to the new town. On the way we passed through a sort of corridor that was filled with really old statues, it was fucking rad. Then, as we got to the end of it we noticed this painted on the wall

'HOW MANY EARS MUST A MAN HAVE TO HEAR PEOPLE CRY?'

Ohhhh, fucking do one you prick. What is the point in that, really? What do you think is going to happen? People will read that and think... 'Woah... you know... He's right! We should start listening to people in pain' To whoever wrote that; you are a fucking cretin. If you really want to make a difference, go and do some volunteering or sell all your things and give the money to charity. Anything, literally ANYTHING is better than spraying that shit on the side of a wall. What the FUCK were you thinking?

Another good one I saw was stencilled on a bench in Leeds, it simply said 'AT SOME POINT IN THIS CONVERSATION, ONE OF YOU WILL LIE' Nice one... I mean, your probably right, so at least your vandalism is more relevant than my previous two examples. So people sometimes tell lies, you worked it out, well done. Maybe go write your term paper on it or something like that? ANYTHING but painting it on a bench.

The most inane piece of 'street art' I've seen was in Bristol on the side of a venue, in early 2000. It read 'YOU'VE HAD YOUR MILLENNIUM, THIS ONE'S OURS' and the 'A' in 'HAD' was an anarchy sign... What the fuck does that even mean?! Punks are going to come back and take over the world? Smash the state and bring down the police? Abolish money and possessions? Ooooohhh... terrifying. If there's one thing I'm not afraid of, it's a fucking punx revolution. The useless cunts are still fighting Thatcher, by the time they reach 2010 the second ice age would have hit.

Really, what do these idiots think is going to happen when people see these scrawled message on the wall? Are we supposed stop and think? Muse on the ifs and buts of our existence? Stand there and applaud? Bow down in the street at their intelligent insights into the modern world? Or should we just blow our fucking brains out because they're shown us life has no meaning?

FUCK OFF, SHIT CUNTS.